“As with the migrant birds, so surely with us, there is a voice within, if only we would listen to it, that tells us certainly when to go forth into the unknown.” ~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

When I began this journey- traveling, writing, and being happy- I promised myself I’d do one, definite thing: listen to my instincts.  I’d follow that internal pull like a compass, trusting it and the divine behind it to lead me true.  I didn’t want to fling myself madly into trouble, but I was tired of living safe and secure in prison.  I’ve learned, through listening, that I have to be cautious but not worried, doing my best to discern the sometimes-subtle differences between that pure instinct and my own fear of change and uncertainty.  There’s no way to be sure a decision is right, but due diligence (research, ask questions, double check things, seek others’ opinions) and choosing boldly what feels right in my soul hasn’t led me astray yet.

Because I promised myself I’d listen, I’ve been very, very cautious in moving forward with the job offer I wrote about last.  It sounds wonderful, and my diligent research proved that yes the company is legit, yes people work for them, yes they do give what they offer, yes it’s safe.  But something just hasn’t felt right.  As awesome as the job sounds, I haven’t been able to get excited about it.  That tells me something.

As I listened, I learned. I spoke to the Saudi rep for the company about a week ago and I just didn’t like him.  He was brusque to the point of rudeness and didn’t give me an opportunity to ask any of the questions I had about the visa process.  I thought, “Well, we were on Skype, and the connection was kind of bad. I won’t throw the baby out with the bathwater just on the basis of one conversation.”  But the job offer changed at some point, from a university position in a smaller city to a job working a split-shift at an institute in the capital.  That’s not at all what I want, regardless of the money.

Then, a couple of days later, I had an interview with the director of a university in Saudi Arabia- the job I really, really wanted all along.  She was wonderful: interesting, personable, communicative, and informative.  We chatted for nearly an hour, talking about this and that in addition to the actual interview.  As it turns out, the university won’t be using the company to staff their preparatory year program anymore because they don’t like the curriculum and want to run the program themselves.  The longer I talked with her the more that pull inside me said, “Yes!”  When she told me the job won’t start until September, but that she intends to offer me a position, I knew.  It doesn’t matter that I’ll have to figure out what to do until then, THIS is the job I want.  Everything in me knows it.

So, here I am, listening and (now) waiting.  I’ve got a few opportunities between now and then, one for a 6-month contract in Chile, among others, so I have ideas.  But I am completely without definites.  I’m okay with that.  My instincts tell me I’m going the right direction.