A new year.


2015 was, without question, the worst year of my life.  I managed to keep it together.  I didn’t hurt myself (though I wanted to) or anybody else.  I got up and went to work; I held onto my relationships and wasn’t a complete bitch to the people I love.  I made it work.  I survived.  But it was the worst, saddest, angriest, most heartbreaking year of my life. My mama’s illness shattered me, and her death only made me realize how broken I already was. I didn’t sleep for weeks and felt, day after day, like I simply couldn’t breathe.  I realized I have no idea what I want for myself, now that I can think about myself again.

But it’s a new year.

The memory is never going to be gone, but I have let the pain pass over me and through me and I can move on.

So, in this new year, I am going to start thinking about what I want for myself now.  I’m going to start trying looking for healing, joy, and fulfillment again.  I’m going to fight to get back on the road this blog started with: the road to finding what brings me bliss, to fueling my passions, to chasing my dreams.

To that end, I am pledging to blog, at least once a month, about something that makes me happy. A trip I’ve taken, something I’ve written, or any other thing that has recently brought me joy.  Starting today.

Today I am going to be thankful for my love of the outdoors, the resources I have for enjoying it, and the amazing people I get to enjoy it with.

IMG_20151009_135915116In October, on my first vacation in 2 years, I went camping at Ochlockonee River State Park, not far from home.  I loaded the kayak, the camping gear, and myself, and off I went.  3 days of sleeping in a tent, paddling local rivers, cooking outdoors, hiking, and enjoying the animals.


Rare white squirrel, which we see often in our area.


The Steinhatchee falls (photo by my good friend Jana)

In November, the weekend after Thanksgiving, some of my favorite people and I loaded the kayaks, caravanned for nearly 2 hours south, and paddled down the


My sweetheart & his tie-dyed kaykak.

Steinhatchee river, on one of the prettiest, warmest days we had the entire fall.  It was delightful, and I was reminded how blessed I am to have people I love who love the same things I do and enjoy sharing those things with me.


There’s no such thing as a bad day on the river.